Is it even possible to gradually go back to work?

This is what I keep asking myself as I slowly dip my toes back into the work pond while wondering if I’ll just end up engulfed by it. I wasn’t planning on going back for at least 6 months (was hoping for a year). Part of me left thinking I’d never go back. Here I was, though, exactly 12 weeks after giving birth, driving to the office to meet one of my employees who was resigning.

I haven’t been completely disconnected. I’ve answered emails here and there, but they were mostly dumb process questions. It had not been anything that would suck me in to the same old drama and stress. One of the pluses of working for the family is that I get a say in how slowly I want to ease back into work. I’m not going to lose my job if I don’t go back right now. However, my personality doesn’t really allow me to shut off completely and not care about my team being left without a leader.

So here I am getting ready to go back part-time. One half day in office and some work from home time the rest of the week. Time will tell how much time I need to put in and how I can set the boundaries. I’ve already spent every day this week on email and as soon as people see me in the office on Monday, the flood gates will open.

I’m hoping that I maintain the boundaries needed because I do not want to miss out on this time with my girls. Every day they surprise me with how much they are growing and developing. I love our morning walks. I love our hugs (well, me hugging them). I love everything about them. I want to be here for everything and as they become more and more interactive, I want to be physically interacting with them.