Sorry for being so disconnected, but I literally was. My internet stopped working on Wednesday out in the NC lake house and didn’t seem to want to work again. Now I’m back home with my alarm set for 6 am to head off to the office tomorrow.
When I was younger I hated missing school. Not because I was that much of a nerd (just a little bit), but because I was didn’t want to miss out. I didn’t want to feel lost when I got back: having missed a test that I then had to make up somehow or an important lecture whatever self induced drama had happened with my friends. I know it sounds crazy, but I really didn’t like the feeling of coming back and hearing about things that happened while I wasn’t there. It wasn’t until senior year that I realized I wasn’t missing much. As long as I didn’t have a test that day, I didn’t care much.
With work, I started similarly. It was always hard for me to take vacations because of how much prep work you have to do before you go and then the avalanche of emails that awaits you. If I felt a little sick, I thought about what big meeting I might be missing or what was on my to do list. As time went on, every once in awhile I’d take a “work from home” day saying I wasn’t feeling that great. Those days meant checking email regularly and maybe having a couple of conference calls, but spending the majority of the day vegging out at home.
This sabbatical has been a really drastic break not just in regards of my work ethic, but from that fear of missing out. Contrary to what people thought would happen, I truly disconnected. Emails were not coming into my phone. I did check them a couple of times, but there was nothing besides HR type emails since everyone knew I was out. Even my father and brothers cut out the work talk around me. Only this last week have they started to mention a little bit of what’s been going on around the office, so I’m going into the office tomorrow having missed a lot. I don’t know what our inventory levels are. I have no idea what’s going on with customers. And I definitely don’t know what kind of drama has been going on between departments in my absence.
It feels somewhat unsettling, but at the same time it definitely is better than coming back from a 1 week vacation. I have no choice but to ease in because I need to be filled in on what’s been happening by my employees and my boss. It should be interesting.
It will also be a long week. Tuesday afternoon I head out to the California office for the remainder of the week. I finally get to see the finished office building that I worked on for the last 3 years and we have our first board meeting there. It should should be interesting.
You also might be wondering what decision I’ve made. And the truth is I’m still waffling between two things, so I’m hoping that the first couple of days back at the office help sway me one way or the other…